Monday, February 14, 2011

His Peace

 Christina's Story - Most of you know this story already but I promised the Lord I would speak of His Work, His Words and His Glory.  Over the next several days I am going to share what has become Christina's Testimony.  Glory be to Our Lord Jesus Christ.

The first day of the news I was just numb. I was drained. I had no emotions. I did feel ridiculously stupid for crying the day before. How selfish of me!!!

God gave me a baby…how many women…how many families would give everything they had to have this life growing in their womb and here I was complaining that it was going to be a girl!! Who was I? What a selfish little girl!

The first person I called was Debra Loper.  Debra and her husband Jim Loper are pastors at Cornerstone Church.  Randy and I have become good friends with them and they have prayed in agreement with us for this child for some time.  Debra & Pastor Loper were amazing.  They walked me through the first few days, gave me great scriptures, and encouraged me.  Then I called my Momma...the ultimate encourager.  She was positive and told me that my baby was just fine and we we get through this.  If anyone could relate to what I was going through it was my Mom.  When she was pregnant with me they told her that she would not carry me full-term, that I would be very sick, and not to expect me to live.

The next few days I pulled myself somewhat together I started doing some real praying…some real searching for God in this news…what did I really believe in.

I really wanted to do the Amniocenteses test…no matter the risk involved. I wanted to know what I was going to be possibly facing in January. Randy was still totally against this test - he stood firm to this decision.   I submitted to was so hard to do this but I started praying…seeking the Lord through this storm - for an answer.

And the Lord started showing me, telling me, and sending people to me…overnight.

My friend Jolene Fuller told me “Tina…do you think the Lord is going to wake you up at 3am to tell you it’s time and NOT give you the perfect baby?”   I called my sister-in-law Gloria for advice on the Amniocenteses test and she asked me "why would I do it...if it came back positive would I terminate the pregnancy?"  I told her ABSOLUTELY NOT!  I only wanted to do the test so that I could be prepared for what I might have to deal with in January.  Gloria told me I could prepare without the the research on Down Syndrome....join a support group.  She was right.  Her words that day gave me strength & encouragement.

The Lord reminded me of a prophecy Randy and I received on August 8th at church.   Randy and I were told that “we would experience a shaking that would be almost unbearable but God would be there with us”.  Then we were told “to rely on the Lord for the words – do not react or respond to any circumstances in the next six months out of what your emotions or natural man would do. Respond to what my Spirit says to do.  Ask Me first before you open your mouth and I will give you wisdom…extreme wisdom & counsel on how to walk through this”.  

After I heard this prophecy again I knew at that moment I was not suppose to do this Amniocenteses test…Randy was right. I could not let my emotions or natural man react. I had to learn to trust on the Lord – ALONE.

I was trying to control and plan my life. I wanted to call the shots, I wanted my agenda, I wanted my plans, I wanted everything to be my way….and I wanted the Lord to just go along with me and my plans. Forget what He knows…let me lead! 

ME….ME….ME…Me….my way…my way…my way!!   Until I let go I was going to be bound up in myself…and in this world you have to let the Lord lead you…He knows what is best and what is best for us.

The Lord immediately started telling me scriptures after scriptures, after scriptures.  One morning a few days after the news He was giving me scriptures so fast I could not write them down fast enough. Every scripture was about hope, faith, grace, and perseverance. I had many scriptures on perseverance…scriptures I have never read before! It was amazing.  

Then the Lord started bringing all these people to me that told me they had positive Amniocenteses tests & positive AFP tests and their babies were perfect. 

I learned to lean on the Lord or Randy – or both at the same time!

There were many times that I just fell apart in Randy’s arms sobbing and then times that I laugh at the image of the Lord dragging me around behind Him because I refuse to let go of the hem of His garment!  Look up the verse Matthew 9:21. 

I was not always strong.  I had many moments of doubt, wonder, stress, and worry but in the back of my mind I knew the Lord had me matter what happened.  The Lord knows what I can handle and what is truly best for my life.

As I look back I am so thankful this test was positive and I went through what I went through.  It brought me closer to the Lord.  I learned more about Him and myself.

The value of this season will no doubt be priceless.

1 comment:

Mookie 59 said...

Moving testimony...Happy Valentines Day and a Happy Birthday to you and thank you for sharing..Please continue when you can..